On 8th December 1943, my dad was born. He was raised by his grandad Alfred William Tilley as back then having a child out of wedlock was seen to be a sin. Alf was married to Lillian Tilley, she was in my dads eyes his mum, even though his birth mother was Alfred’s daughter Avis.
Dad never complained about his childhood, he was always content, he never had the toys that the kids of today have, he made do with toys that kids of today would turn their noses up at, but that was all they had after the war. Alf and Lillian never had a lot of money, Alf worked as a yard hand at the local Council yard, and Lill was a house wife.
Dad was always happy with what he had, i never once heard him complain about not having the best things, the best toys, dad was always happy with what he had, he appreciated things and he looked after them. He still has his wooden toys from when he was a child.
My dad learnt to drive on a Hilman SuperMinx, most people will have no idea what that is. Dad was taught to drive by Alf, when he passed his test in 1960, he had a Frog Eye Sprite, i can still remember the reg of that car, 592 CTA.
Dad met mum in 1970, they were married in 1973 and after an ill fated trip to Scotland, they came back with me. When i was born, dad had purchased his first shop which is now the Co Op in Boyatt Wood shops, Eastleigh. Dad went on to have a chain of shops, which he subsequently sold to his business partner.
Lillian passed away in 1974 and Alf passed away in 1983, they were both buried in Eastleigh where they lived their lives.
Dad was never out of work, he would not claim benefits, his view was that you pay into the system to help those less fortunate than you. My dad never went to college or university, he never had the chance, but he never ever found himself out of work, he worked as Area Manager and Regional Manager for a large corporation, one thing about dad that always stuck with me was his love for mathematics, he was excellent, he could work things out in his head quicker than i could on a calculator.
Dad made a few mistakes in his life, he would be the first to say that. His biggest was in 1976 when he was offered an 8 Litre Bentley for 25 quid, he said at the time he didn’t have the need for a gas guzzler like that although now he wished he had brought it. His biggest mistake was getting stung by a rogue mortgage lender, he was missold an endowment mortgage back in the early 90s, when the mortgage came to the end of the term it left dad facing the loss of the family home in 2008. I had left home 4 years earlier, so mum and dad decided that they would simply sell up and move to a small property, they tried to find somewhere local to us as i know they both wanted to stay close to their grandkids and to me and my partner.
Sadly the only house they could find in their price range, with nice surroundings and neighbours, was in Llanelli.
Mum and Dad moved in 2010, dad wasnt truly happy living that far away from us, but he made it work. We would go and see him regularly, our car mileage confirms that to be the case, as the car is now turning over 160,000 miles, it only had 20k on the clock when i brought it.
Dad never complained about his health, he was stubborn, anyone who knew him would know that you would not get him to do something if he didnt want to. Im afraid i have that trait too.
On Sunday, mum rang me to say that dad needed an ambulance, she didnt know what to do, she was quite upset, dad was awake and alert but he wasnt clearly not well. I rang 999 for them, and i spoke to my dad, his last word to me were “please look after you mum for me”. As i sit here typing, im crying, thinking about those words, i promised dad i would, i promised him i would take care of mum, and i will whatever is needed.
Dad passed away around 6pm on Sunday 24th July 2022. He will be missed. He was my best friend, he was my hero, he was my mums rock, he wasnt perfect, then again no one is. He was my world, my shoulder to cry on, my voice of reason, my daddy.
He will be sorely missed by all of the family. Rest in peace big guy.